Welcome back, to a new month of me giving uninformed responses to movies that are just hitting the theaters. This is a pretty big week as everyone rushes into try and fill the void left by the Big Bang that was “Guardians of the Galaxy” last week. If you have not seen that yet, it still should rank higher on your list than anything opening this week. This BSR! Weekend Movie Previews is for the weekend of August 8, 2014.
Per usual, before we get started, a quick disclaimer. I write these over my lunch at my day job, all of the film information presented here, including the plot summary, has been pulled from the Opening This Week page of IMDb (http://www.imdb.com/nowplaying/). I have not seen any of these movies at the time of this writing.
Join us this week as we preview “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles”, “The Hundred Foot Journey”, and more.
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2014)
PG-13 101 min – Action | Adventure | Comedy | Fantasy | Sci-Fi
Director: Jonathan Liebesman
Stars: Megan Fox, Will Arnett, William Fichtner, Noel Fisher
Summary: Darkness has settled over New York City as Shredder and his evil Foot Clan have an iron grip on everything from the police to the politicians. The future is grim until four unlikely outcast brothers rise from the sewers and discover their destiny as Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. The Turtles must work with fearless reporter April O’Neil and her cameraman Vern Fenwick to save the city and unravel Shredder’s diabolical plan.
Thoughts: Blech. No interest whatsoever. Here is our own Neverbot’s review: Why ‘Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles’ Doesn’t Suck, and here is our own CitizenBot’s review: No, ‘Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles’ DOES Suck
The Hundred-Foot Journey (2014)
PG 122 min – Drama
Director: Lasse Hallström
Stars: Helen Mirren, Om Puri, Manish Dayal, Charlotte Le Bon
Summary: The Kadam family clashes with Madame Mallory, proprietress of a celebrated French restaurant, after they open their own nearby eatery, until undeniable chemistry causes the Madame to take gifted young chef Hassan under her wing.
Thoughts: Do you know how I know that I am getting old. That I actually kinda want to see this movie. I have been in love with Helen Mirren since “Excalibur”, and I am very happy she is more busy now than she has been in a long time. Oh, and Indian food.
Into the Storm (2014)
PG-13 89 min – Action | Thriller
Director: Steven Quale
Stars: Richard Armitage, Sarah Wayne Callies, Matt Walsh, Max Deacon
Summary: Storm trackers, thrill-seekers, and everyday townspeople document an unprecedented onslaught of tornadoes touching down in the town of Silverton.
Thoughts: I have no idea what to think of this movie. Other than it has Thorin Oakenshield. I hope it doesn’t last as long as “The Hobbit”, because that would be one long ass boring storm. It looks like a Syfy original without the cheap effects and goofy sense of humor. It looks like the Hallmark Channel version of “2012”. It looks like it is stuck halfway between being “Armageddon” and “Sharnado”. What I am trying to say is that it looks really, really bland.
Step Up All In (2014)
PG-13 112 min – Drama | Music | Romance
Director: Trish Sie
Stars: Ryan Guzman, Briana Evigan, Adam G. Sevani, Misha Gabriel Hamilton
Summary: All-stars from the previous Step Up installments come together in glittering Las Vegas, battling for a victory that could define their dreams and their careers.
Thoughts: Blech.
What If (2013)
PG-13 102 min – Comedy | Drama | Romance
Director: Michael Dowse
Stars: Daniel Radcliffe, Zoe Kazan, Megan Park, Adam Driver
Summary: Wallace, who is burned out from a string of failed relationships, forms an instant bond with Chantry, who lives with her longtime boyfriend. Together, they puzzle out what it means if your best friend is also the love of your life.
Thoughts: Well, that trailer pretty much explained the whole movie. If there are actually monsters or Radcliffe turns out to be a vampire or something, I would say “well played, Studio marketing department.” But I don’t expect anything like that. I expect exactly what the trailer has made me expect, a twee romantic comedy with quirky characters who almost have chemistry with one another, but not quite.
The Dog (2013) – [Limited]
Not Rated 100 min – Documentary
Directors: Allison Berg | Frank Keraudren
Stars: John Wojtowicz, Carmen Bifulco, Jeremy Bowker, Liz Debbie Eden
Summary: A documentary portrait of the late John Wojtowicz, whose attempted robbery of a Brooklyn bank to finance his male lover’s sex-reassignment surgery was the real-life inspiration for Dog Day Afternoon (1975).
Thoughts: Holy crap, this looks fantastic. I love “Dog Day Afternoon”. There are few movies that approach the sheer character intensity that it does. And Pacino is tremendous, and John Cazale is the perfect support. I am surprised that there hasn’t been a docu like this much earlier. Now I want to watch the movie and then this back to back.
About Alex (2014) – [Limited]
R 96 min – Drama
Director: Jesse Zwick
Stars: Nate Parker, Jason Ritter, Maggie Grace, Max Greenfield
Summary: When a group of old college friends reunite over a long weekend after one of them attempts suicide, old crushes and resentments shine light on their life decisions, and ultimately push friendships and relationships to the brink.
Thoughts: We are defined as a species by our ability to sit through 96 minutes of youngish people being clever and witty, but also feeling deeply, while simultaneously giving into their every selfish impulse. We are doomed.
Deepsea Challenge 3D (2014) – [Limited]
PG 90 min – Documentary
Directors: John Bruno | Ray Quint | Andrew Wight
Stars: James Cameron, Frank Lotito, Lachlan Woods, Paul Henri
Summary: A 3D documentary chronicling filmmaker James Cameron’s diving expeditions in his Deepsea Challenger submarine.
Thoughts: It is always reassuring to know that our global deep sea scientific expeditions and exploration is totally dependent on the whims of the guy who directed “True Lies”.
Now, it’s your turn – if you have seen any of these movies, let us know your thoughts in the comments. Especially about “Guardians of the Galaxy”.