Rooney Mara (“Her” and “The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo”) has been cast to play Tiger Lily in an upcoming “Peter Pan” origin story from Warner Bros.
“Peter Pan” was my first literary love. The story has influenced my life in more ways than one, I read it on the regular and memorialized the title character in a (ridiculously large according to my mother) tattoo somewhere on my body. I’ll leave the location of my Peter to your imaginations.
Rest easy in the knowledge that if my mother has seen it, it can’t be too naughty…
Suffice it to say, I will dagger fight someone over “Peter Pan.” So I’m skeptical about a reimagining of the story that diverges from canon. Having said that, I’m optimistic and excited that new Neverland stories are being made, worst case scenario, I’ll quietly seethe and pretend it never happened. Best case scenario, I’ll have a new movie to gush over until my loved ones stop talking to me.
Additionally, the rights to J.M. Barrie’s masterpiece reside with the Great Ormond Street Children’s hospital and they collect royalties on all things Pan related, so even a terrible big budget Hollywood iteration of this fictional world will equate to lots of dollars to benefit actual children in the real world.
Which, unless you’re a monster, is impossible to hate.
Mara will join Hugh Jackman as Blackbeard, the films central villain, and Garrett Hedlund, of “Tron Legacy” fame, as the nefarious and form-obsessed Captain Hook. Pan will be played by a boy between the ages of 10 and 12 (duh), but hasn’t yet been cast.
I don’t know much about Mara, but I do know that she looks… not native… in fact, she looks downright pasty, and you know what, I don’t care. As long as she doesn’t suck, and the character doesn’t suck, I’ll be happy. Why, you ask. Because Neverland isn’t a real place (as sad as that makes me) and the native culture there can be as pasty as they damn well please. Conforming to the rules of earthly reality doesn’t seem to apply on the space island.
The story will follow an orphan boy who is taken to Neverland, saves the natives, and battles pirates, which is what he’s good at. That, and forgetting stuff, being cocky, and screaming at the sky, among other things.
Disney also has a “Peter Pan” movie in the works, based on an unofficial prequel titled “Peter and the Starcatchers” which will presumably take a lighter track than Warner Bros’ “Pan” which, according to The Hollywood Reporter will be like giving Peter the “Batman Begins” treatment. Personally I’d like to see a darker Pan flick; the actual story is pretty dark. Pan isn’t above killing pirates in the name of fun, but not before he wakes them up so they can be acutely aware of their doom, he even kills Hook at the end of the book.
My apologies for ruining it for anyone who hasn’t read it, after 100 years the embargo gets lifted on spoilers.
I do think there are still stories to be told in that universe. Barrie built plenty of history into the characters that isn’t explored in his novel, the obvious bit to tackle would be the initial battle between Pan and Hook wherein Peter cuts off Hook’s hand and feeds it to the croc.
I’d love to see that scene, I want to see what starts their feud, I want to see why they hate each other so much, and I want to see a little kid cut off the appendage of an adult with a cocky little smile on his face. Preferably while calling Hook a cunt.
That worked out pretty well in another movie.
I hope they don’t screw it up.
“Pan” is set to release on July 17, 2015. Which also happens to be the day I turn 30 so while I’m at the theater pretending to be a boy who never grows up, I can officially say goodbye to what’s left of my youth.
I’ll be the guy in the back of the theater silently weeping.