Ladies and gentleman, I’m pleased to present Hugh Sterbakov to this week’s Indie Books column. He’s a writer on Robot Chicken and a hundred other things, including a new book.
I was going to write this long, impressive, and noble-sounding introduction, but Hugh does it so much better than I ever could… The jerk…
Here he is:
My name is Hugh Sterbakov, and I’m an embattled husband and father. No, really, my wife and two toddler daughters are trying to destroy me. So they can eat me alive. And then hang me. Yes, in that order.
While alive, I was an Emmy-nominated writer for Robot Chicken (in addition to being the world’s first, only, and therefore best, Toy Wrangler). I co-created and wrote the critically acclaimed (yes, that’s code for “modestly successful”) comic book Freshmen. I sold a lot of “critically acclaimed” film and TV scripts to the likes of Disney, Fox, Paramount, AMC and the SyFy Network, and developed projects with Ben Stiller, Don Murphy and Gale Anne Hurd.
Watch out below, I’m dropping names!
I also wrote the upcoming stop-motion R-rated comedy Hell & Back, starring the voice talents of TJ Miller, Nick Swardson, Rob Riggle, Danny McBride, Susan Sarandon and Mila Kunis. I hope the critics hate it and it makes a mint.
My novel, City Under the Moon, isn’t a comedy, but it has been critically acclaimed. Honestly. For example:
“It’s got everything I like in a novel: genetically-enhanced kick-ass female agents, a nerdy hero who gets the girl, top-secret super-weapons, the most ferocious monsters in recent memory… this thriller kept me thrilled until the very end!”
– Aury Wallington, author of the New York Times bestselling novel Saving Charlie; writer for Veronica Mars and Heroes.And:
“The best werewolf novel I’ve ever read.”
– Richard Hatem, writer/producer of Grimm, The Mothman Prophecies, Secret Circle, Miracles, Supernatural and The Lost RoomWut wut!
“Fast-paced, action-packed and terrifying.”
– Mila KunisYes, that’s the Mila Kunis. Not the one working at the Frosty Freeze with the Twitter account saying things like, “I totes wanna get boned like 50 Shades of Grey.”
Here’s the pitch, which, admittedly, has nothing to do with the tone of anything I’ve been “critically acclaimed” for…
A werewolf epidemic tears through Manhattan, unleashed as a form of bioterrorism. It spreads exponentially with each rise of the moon, testing the might of our armed forces and pushing the government to prepare a dire solution. The madman behind it has only one demand: Find a cure.
The FBI’s most ruthless counterterrorism agent, Brianna Tildascow, must collaborate Lon Toller, with a misanthropic blogger and self-proclaimed werewolf expert. Together, they’ll undertake an international hunt for the man behind the werewolves, and meet a mysterious stranger who uncovers a shocking historical revelation.
In more famous words:
“Bioweapon catastrophes, government conspiracies, military sieges, historical revelations, psychological warfare and werewolves. You want more thrill from a thriller?”
– Seth GreenDuring two years of meticulous research, I worked with a USC virologist, several physicists, an FBI agent, a USMC sniper, an Army helicopter pilot and a retired colonel to realistically dramatize the horror unfolding at the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, the White House war rooms, the FBI strategy centers, the military landing zones and on the streets of Manhattan.
Yeah, I’m not even kidding. Robot Chicken guy went and wrote this. Look, someone’s gotta make werewolves scary again. Might as well be me.
The book has a 5-star average rating on Amazon, along with a bunch of reviews from less-famous people (less famous is code for “you probably don’t care”). But they’re honest. Swear. It’s a good book, even though it’s critically acclaimed.
TL;DR
A HUNDRED THOUSAND WEREWOLVES IN NEW YORK.
–Hugh Sterbakov is the guy who wrote this.
See? He did that better than I could have. City Under the Moon is available on Amazon. You can check out the official website for the book here, and then be sure to follow Hugh on twitter.