COUNTDOWN TO MAN OF STEEL: KMC1138 Loves Smallville and She Doesn’t Care Who Knows It.

There was a time when I was concerned about how others saw me, and how my choices in entertainment influenced those decisions. It started when I was wee, when I was hesitant to admit that I liked Star Trek in school. Then it progressed to a point where I would call things like my love of pop music a “guilty pleasure.”

Friends, I no longer believe in guilty pleasures. If you judge me on the things that entertain me, I give zero bothers. And you know what? I freakin’ LOVED “Smallville.” I loved it.

I never watched “The Adventures of Lois and Clark” because Teri Hatcher bothered me. So I had been on a serious Superman drought when “Smallville” came along. The tales of a pre-Superman Superman starring Bo Duke, Lana from the movies, and the Devil from “Brimstone”? Well OK! I was losing interest in Awesome Dawson’s Creek so I needed another show that I was probably too old to watch to fill my void of teen angst – and that it happened to be about Clark Kent just made it 4000% more awesome. I will freely admit that maybe the meteor shower in the pilot doesn’t hold up, but in 2001 that shit knocked me off my feet. I probably misted up a bit, as I am wont to do where Superman mythology is concerned, and “Smallville” had itself a die-hard.

The show really started off as a freak-of-the-week X-Files meets 90210 hybrid. It was fun, and the meteor freaks let the CW test its fledgling sci-fi wings. The acting was not mind blowing in the beginning, especially with the younger folks, but the casting was somehow still impeccable. The chemistry between Clark and John Schneider’s Jonathan Kent was especially powerful, and even though we all knew it was coming (oh shut up it’s not a spoiler  – all superheroes’ father figures die), Jonathan’s death was devastating to fans.

As the show grew, so did it’s winks to Superman fans. Terrence Stamp as the voice of Jor-El? Brilliant. Helen Slater as Lara? SHUT UP. And – sidebar – can we please just talk about giving all the awards to the person who decided Pam Grier should play Amanda Waller? Because… just… yeah. Christopher Reeve even made a couple of cameos (and I of course wept), but even more impressive, perhaps, is that Margot Kidder joined in for an episode. It just got more and more fun as the DC lineup joined in, and “Smallville” became less a story of the freak of the week and more the story of how a boy becomes a legend.

Yes, the show did suffer some flaws (‘you guys – Lana’s about to cry again. Drink!”), and the departure of Michael Rosenbaum’s Lex left a giant hole that could not be filled, no matter how big the bads got. And Bruce Wayne never showed up. You guys. Seriously. I held out until the last damn shot. I totally thought we’d get a Bruce Wayne moment.

I’m not one to recommend skipping seasons when watching a show (for instance, YES, for the love of god start with the ninth doctor), but season one of “Smallville,” excepting the pilot, can be comfortably skipped. There are some callbacks towards the end of the show, but nothing that will confuse you. But, if you aren’t in a place to commit to ten years worth of awesome, I’ve done some footwork and gathered a list of must-see/fun/canon episodes.

Season One – pilot

Season Two – “Heat” – Clark gets a boner in the form of heat vision, and “Rosetta” – the first appearance of Dr. Virgil Swann

Season Three – Lots of episodes dealing with the Lex/Lionel dynamic, but really the only big deal is the arrival of Kara in “Covenant.” You might know her as Supergirl.

Season Four – “Crusade.” Hellooooooooo, Lois Lane! “Run” – “Clark meets a boy with super speed who doesn’t take responsi-” yeah no one cares because that’s The Flash, y’all. There’s also some witch possession and unification of Kryptonian knowledge crystals. Seriously.

Season Five – “Aqua.” Aquaman goes by “AC” in Smallville. In “Thirst,” Lana becomes a vampire (oh look guys, something really shitty is about to happen to Lana. Chug!). More importantly, Professor Milton Fine is introduced in this episode. “Cyborg.” Just guess. “Vessel” – kneel before Zod.

Season Six – “Sneeze” – it’s funny. “Arrow” – yup, you guessed it. “Static” – you guys. The Candyman is totally the Martian Manhunter. “Justice” – OK I will admit they were not very clever with episode titles. Also in season six Lana and Lex get engaged and Lana gets pregnant with…. just watch season six.

Season Seven – You know what, just watch all of them from here on. Except “Hero.” That one’s dumb.

I realize that I sound a bit snarky in my nostalgia here, but I assure I have never had as much fun with a television show as I did with “Smallville.” I miss trying to resist a peak at Kryptonsite every week, and I still have to play that Remy Zero theme song once every couple of months. It was a good time, and I’m always glad to revisit it.