The third part of the Droids arc is probably the first one I just wasn’t feeling. Gascon, Artoo, and the rest of the droids have made their way to a city through the void. Still holding the encryption module and needing to find a way off planet and back to the Republic, they look for ways out.

Gascon, finding himself scrambling for food in a garbage pile, discovers an amnesiac clone working as a dishwasher. Reminding him of his heritage, his memory returns and he offers to help them get back to their ship.

That’s it. That’s what the entirety of the episode was.

It has some interesting ideas and moments. There was a message about sacrifice and soldiers, but it seemed a bit ham-fisted. I did like the Russian Sullustan, too. I love seeing the modelers branch out and bring us animated versions of classic Star Wars aliens with a twist. This was no exception. I’d just like to see a benevolent Sullustan now. Or even a young Nien Nunb.

The other interesting idea in the episode seemed more like a bone to throw video game nerds. Gregor is a Republic commando and has to single-handedly help the droids get away. His sequences feel like a first person shooter, right down to the exploding barrels.

I enjoyed the Republic Commando game as much as the next man, but I really didn’t need an episode of The Clone Wars devoted to it. I preferred the droids when they were on their own and acting as comic foils to each other and the drama. This episode was rather dry and had a few oddities to it.

For one, it felt odd that the camera cut every time a character was going to cross the orange water gutters in the street. They were there to add flavor, but at the point where it was set-dressing that wasn’t used or addressed, something just felt off about it. And I also noticed for the first time, too, that there weren’t any stairs at all. Everything is a ramp. Is animating people walking down stairs that difficult?

I might just be the reverse of everyone watching this arc. I loved the first two and this one, the second the brought in a clone, was boring to me and I sort of wish they hadn’t.

But knowing a bit about the dramatic arcs coming up, I won’t–can’t–complain. The Clone Wars has given us a hundred episodes and the vast majority of them have been beyond fantastic. Here’s to hoping we get at least a hundred more.

Well, AHS did some things very actually indubitably well tonight. So let’s talk about that stuff first.

Jessica Lange is moving up in my own personal royal court of actresses. She’s up to kick-ass duchess right about now. I feel that “quiet badassery” is a term I’ve used before, but it just sums her up so perfectly. The flippant toss of cigarette ash at a demon, the cool and steady stare at a nun-weilded cucumber (yes, they were using it for “that” purpose, le sigh) – that is why I call this The Jessica Lange Show.

Pepper the Pinhead. WOW. The FX makeup and the ADR for this character were tight and gorgeous. For reference, here is a comparison between the character and the actress:

I mean, that’s good stuff. And Grossman’s performance is threatening yet subtle – as if you were to take Kevin Spacey from “Se7en” and combine him with Fox Mulder and there you go. That’s her. And she’s terrifying enough to make even Arden stop in his tracks when attempting to harm Grace’s baby.

I am not so blind as to call Thredsen’s entrance in this episode “genius,” or even particularly original, but man did it work on a level that I suspect the creators actually wanted it to work. Before the hiatus, Thredsen had disappeared from his closet and his whereabouts (and partner in escape) were unknown. But as he strutted in to Briarcliff’s rec room to the tune of Screamin’ Jay Hawkins’s “I Put a Spell on You,” this man was erotic and just damn cool. Did I fall trap to the show’s style over substance, or did they really make a monster sexified? As it turns out, Demon!Mary Eunice was his co-conspirator and had in fact presented him with a full time job at the hospital. Much to the chagrin of Lana and Kit, of course.

The cinematography in this episode was not up to par with the first few episodes of the season, but there was some interesting shadow play, especially in the scenes with the Monsignor and Demon!Mary Eunice. Oh yeah, and the priest and the possessed nun had sex. Have I just been defiled by all the warped authors I’ve read in my life? Most of this show is so house marm shockable that it just doesn’t even register as filth to me, which is probably why I was so impressed with the Thredsen intro – I felt icky for thinking him hot. So again, well done on that.

Monsignor Howard confessed his sin and his realization to Jude, but only after she’d been ECT’d to the point of drool and dementia. She nonetheless managed to give one coherent penance to him: “Kill her.” And he did. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it four thousand times again, I do not like to be smacked over the head with my metaphors, and I so would have rather seen Mary Eunice fall to the floor crumpled and vulnerable versus Christlike, but we are watching AHS, so you take what you can get. It was a beautifully framed and shot with stark color contrasts and a lovely slow motion dawning of relief on the young nun’s face, but the crucifixion pose was the ball bat over my head that made me frown a little.

The real surprise of the show, and some of the best writing, came from a sequence of events for which I shall not reveal the climax. When the show does something this well, I don’t like to ruin it for those who haven’t watched. Monsignor Howard and Dr. Arden were discussing the disposal of Mary Eunice’s body, and the tension built soaringly. Lingers, pauses, and brilliant acting let the viewer know that her “funeral,” as it were, would not go without event, but its actual turn remained a mystery to me until the last possible second. It was a surprise, and left me wondering what direction the show will take.

But. Oh, lord, the “but.” Twenty minutes in, and shortly after Jude’s torture in the ECT room, there was an actual – like, I can’t even type it – an actual, flirty, bubblegum song and dance number. Was it meant to horrifying? With Jude’s pink lipstick and inmates pounding their heads bloody, microencephalitics bobbing in time, and others dancing as though pulled from a Tool video, probably. It. Was Not. It was displaced, schlocky, and served zero purpose in forwarding the narrative. Nay – what’s more zero than zero? Whatever the answer, that’s the purpose the musical number served. You can watch it here. You totally should. Seriously.

Next week’s previews, with more flash forwards and Mark Romanek shots, left me unenthusiastic.  But I will remain as open minded as I usually am. Which is, you know, not very.

Darth Vader learns a hard truth about wiping the Jedi from memory in the conclusion of Purge: The Tyrant’s Fist, this week’s Star Wars comic. (more…)

Scoundrels is Timothy Zahn’s return to the Star Wars universe and he delivers us a send up of Ocean’s Eleven, starring Han Solo, Chewbacca, Lando, and a number of other characters those of us who have read any of the Expanded Universe would know (and a pile of new characters, too.)

Set just after the events of A New Hope, Han Solo is in debt to Jabba, just like always, and is looking for a score that will settle his debts when one that is too good to be true falls into his lap (almost by coincidence.) It’s a daring heist and he’ll need a team to pull it off. He brings in a whole host of criminals, rogues, and scoundrels and they get set to work.

The story is generally straightforward for the long-con structure Zahn goes after. That’s not to say there aren’t any twists and turns, there are MANY twists and turns, but they’re almost to be expected for the sort of story that’s being told. Though you expect there to be those twists and turns, Zahn manages to find ways to twist them one step further than you’d expect. There truly is nothing predictable about this book. And every time our scoundrels get a bead on how to do things, a new hydrospanner is thrown into the sublight drive.

The book is highly entertaining and enjoyable. I had a smile on my face the whole time. Tim’s writing just does that. It’s sure of itself and knows what it’s doing. To my mind, there aren’t enough Star Wars books that maintain that light-hearted sense of adventure that permeates Star Wars. Too often they’re brooding affairs, which is fine. I love Shatterpoint and Darth Plagueis as much as the next man. But sometimes you just want a fun Star Wars book, and this is among the best.

I loved the assortment of characters, from the con-men employed to Han and Lando’s delicate relationship. It all rang so true that it made me happy. I also really loved the way Winter was used in the book, and how they actually played on the recent destruction of Alderaan. I really don’t think enough attention is paid to the fact that billions of people were killed on Alderaan and there are people in the galaxy who felt it. Zahn gives us that window through Winter and utilizes her better than I can ever remember her being used.

Perhaps in a couple of weeks I’ll write a new review to discuss the ending. Because the book ends in a way that forces you to want to immediately start it over again, and I wouldn’t blame anyone who does. It’s a totally different experience reading it over from the beginning knowing what you learned through the first read through. But I don’t want to leave any spoilers. Just know that there are revelations you learn by the end of the book that almost require a second reading.

My only complaint about the book was the length. I really feel like it could have been a tight 50 or 60,000 words and felt more like a movie. The book was long and perhaps it could have been tightened down, streamlined for a better movie-like pace. But I’ll take what I can get.

I would give this book 5 stars. It’s excellent Star Wars, and I don’t often say that about the books in the EU.

You can pick it up on Amazon in hardcover or on Kindle.

109 times.

According to Variety magazine, that’s the number of times the N-word is spoken in Tarantino’s “Django Unchained,” starring Jamie Foxx. The title is a wink to the the 1966 violent, spaghetti Western “Django.”

Not exactly a typical Christmas movie to share with your white husband, brother-in-law and black family in Alabama, but boy, oh boy, was it worth it. Given my very recent and not so favorable viewing of “Pulp Fiction,” I dare say this is Tarantino’s masterpiece of this decade.

Why You Should (And Maybe Shouldn’t) Watch This Flick

The writing and acting that created the unlikely friendship between Django and Dr. Schultz and Django’s undying devotion to rescuing his wife is the underlying theme and what makes this movie so memorable and great. Of course it has the typical Tarantino elements of odd camera shots, grandiose music and gratuitous violence. So much so, it even made me queasy and a few folks, including my Mom, walked out.

In case you’re like me and have been avoiding any trailers or previews, be forewarned: while it’s one thing to see a lot of folks get crazily shot up repeatedly in great, gory cowboy shoot-outs, it’s another thing to watch what happens to the slaves depicted in this movie. The violent realities of U.S. slavery that Tarantino infuses in to the movie is truly, truly horrifying and stomach-churning.

Thankfully, Mom came back and the gory elements of the story were overshadowed by the awesomeness of pretty much everything else. Here are a few spoiler-free reasons why you should stop what you’re doing and go watch this right now:

Acting

Above everything else, the acting in this movie is strangely stellar. I say that because most of the characters tended to be very complicated, yet still very cartoonish people. What makes this movie stand out is that despite the unusual setting, you really begin to develop a deep and meaningful relationship as the viewer with Django and Dr. Schultz in particular. You have a vested interest in their well-being, even though you know their job as bounty hunters is less than pleasant. You want them to succeed even more so than you want the evildoers to get their bloodied comeuppance.

Top acting nods in my book go to Christoph Waltz as Dr. Schultz and Leonardo DiCaprio as Calvin Candie. They get top honors, because a mere change in facial expressions or a body tic emanated their characters. Watching DiCaprio play a vitriolic racist is completely unusual given his previous roles as the reluctant hero. But you believed every scary word coming out of his mouth. Their Golden Globe nominations are incredibly deserved.

Plot

It really is about time we saw some original stuff coming out of Hollywood. I know this year we had a lot of really super epic sequels, but to see something so completely different and new was really what is making this one of the top movies of 2012. A slave turned gun-slinging hero is simply genius. What is even more brilliant is how layered all of the characters were. The movie forces repeat viewings because there is something a little different that you more than likely missed because you were either laughing hysterically, in awe or completely horrified.

It was also relatively simple to understand and follow, which was important, because the movie’s other elements are extremely overpowering at times. However, this is intentional and done very well. Hence, the overuse of the N-word and the over-the-top battles.

My only issue other than the violent scenes is that (yes, as a chick) I wished there was more opportunities to see Django and Broomhilda as a couple. Kerry Washington’s acting talents are only hinted at in this movie.

Writing

This is another element of the movie that shines. Any failings this movie has are completely overshadowed by the quality of the writing. The screenplay makes it clear that these are extremely complex characters, even when done in a caricature-like way. For instance, Leonardo DiCaprio’s character is clever, evil and naive at the same time. Sometimes his lines make it very clear he isn’t really that bright either. The same goes for Django. While he has difficulty reading a wanted poster early on, his more evolved character is conniving and brilliant.

The comedic elements of the writing are key to this movie. There’s dialogue that is so blunt and so witty, it was difficult to keep a straight face, even when the movie has moved on to something much more serious. There is one particular scene involving hooded bandits that was so funny, I was in tears and nearly had to leave the theater to compose myself.

This movie is about slavery. Every gruesome detail. Whether or not you agree with the number of times the N-word is spoken or not, the overall gratification of watching, in my opinion, completely outweighs its minor faults.

What are your thoughts on the movie? Did you think it was too violent or racist? Sound off in the comments below!

I’ve been a fan of Don Hertzfeldt for years. I first became aware of him when I viewed “Rejected” during my freshman year of college back in 2001. It was one of the funniest things I had ever seen and since then I’ve tried to keep up with his work. Well this morning I got a hold of the feature film version of “It’s Such a Beautiful Day,” this film tells the story of Bill, a normal human being as he lives his life, but some mental complications arise and he’s forced to see his life through a distorted lens. I was unprepared for what this film was going to do to me, I had laughed many times at Hertzfeldt’s cartoons and in the first minute I found myself doing the same thing. I laughed so much that I actually had to stop the movie for a moment to catch my breath and in that moment I wondered if the film could sustain itself for the next 60 minutes. I pushed play and then I was treated to one of the most fantastic journeys I’ve ever been on. I laughed, I cried, I hurt. The movie was beautiful and heart wrenching and I could feel myself in Bill. The movie plays with your emotions in ways you didn’t think possible or had forgotten they could be played with. When the film ended I sat in my chair complacent and in awe of what I just watched. Afterwards I went to my top ten list of 2012 and placed this movie right up on number one. This movie is amazing and I can’t recommend it enough. What made me laugh was I watched this film on what is supposedly the last day on earth, and if it really is the last day on earth then I’ll have been glad to have had this film be my last. So I implore you to get your hands on a copy of this film.

You can purchase this film directly from Don Hertzfeldt’s website:

http://www.bitterfilms.com/

The Je’daii realize their mistake by putting the captured invader Xesh with a mad Force user in exile: prison break! Reviewing the second issue of Dawn of the Jedi: Prisoner of Bogan, out this week! (more…)

Agent Cross runs afoul of an old flame, but who is she really working for? GONK goes under the cover of this week’s Agent of the Empire. (more…)

Babes in Toyland is a movie that has a fantastic pedigree. It was the first live-action musical from Walt Disney. It starred Annette Funicello, Tommy Sands, Tommy Kirk, Ray Bolger, Ed Wynn, and Henry Calvin, among other Disney staples of the 50s and 60s. It was written by Ward Kimball who worked in Disney’s animation department working on countless shorts and Disney features.

It should have been an incredible film, but instead it’s just kind of not. Disney wouldn’t perfect the live-action musical formula for a few more years with Mary Poppins, so I’m grateful to this film for being that laboratory.

I loved this film as a kid, and that’s where all of its charm lies. I put it on for my kids and my daughter absolutely loved it and wanted to watch it again. My son, on the other hand, literally decided he’d rather clean his room than watch another minute of Babes in Toyland. I was excited to see how it held up to my nostalgia and I’m sad to say my nostalgia was greater than the movie. It was long, plodding, and the plot isn’t something you can really care about. It follows Mary Quite Contrary (Annette) and her marriage woes. She’s in love with Tom Piper (Tommy Sands) and wants to marry him, but the greedy Barnaby (Ray Bolger) hatches a plan to get rid of Tom and marry her himself. That’s pretty much it. The movie doesn’t even get half interesting until they find themselves inexplicably in Toyland, and Ed Wynn and Tommy Kirk (as the Toymaker and his assistant, respectively) liven up the film considerably.

In fact, I think the best thing about this film is the toy soldier fight and special effects extravaganza that caps off the film. For 1961, the effects are absolutely incredible and on Blu-ray, it just pops.

In fact, the thing I loved most about this rewatch was the color. The look of that old three-strip technicolor on Blu-ray is intoxicating to me. It doesn’t look real and looks like something out of a storybook. But it doesn’t just work here, the Blu-rays of all the films of that era have that same magical quality (especially The African Queen.)

The music, in its moments, can be rather catchy. The visuals are larger than life, and the colors are dazzling. But the story is just too kiddy. I think that might be what Disney hit upon in later years is that you don’t have to pander to children, you need to make a movie for the whole family. It’s something he did with his cartoons and I guess he just had to learn that lesson with movies, too.

You can get it on Amazon for less than $20. It’s far less offensive of a Christmas movie than some of the drivel being made today, it’s pure nostalgic fantasy. And if you have young kids, this movie is perfect.

Finding Nemo is a movie that never clicked for me upon its initial release. It was the second time I skipped a Pixar release during its initial run in theatres. (The first was Monsters Inc., which seemed like it would be boring to me.) Finding Nemo went on to be the highest grossing film of that year, and it still never saw a penny from me.

Years passed, I picked it up for my kids on DVD, and they loved it. They must have watched it a hundred times. But I still never saw it in its entirety. I’d only catches pieces here and there and not think too much about it.

I was sent the Blu-ray for review and I have to say: I’m an idiot for having missed this film. I love Andrew Stanton’s work and I have no idea why this would have been any different. It’s charming, heartwarming, extremely funny, and classic Pixar.

Why didn’t you guys tell me it was so good?

Perhaps it resonates more with me now that I’m a father? I was still a brand new father when it came out originally and it seemed like it would just be “another kids movie” when it came out, but I am still awed by how wrong I was. And so much credit has to go to Albert Brooks. That guy just has a funny voice and his timing is perfect. Even when he’s being serious he’s spot on.

As for the Blu-ray, like any film as high quality as Pixar makes, the Blu-ray elements look absolutely astounding. This film takes place mostly underwater and the volume and feel of that is never lost through the entire narrative.

Aside from the incredible film quality, the Blu-ray boasts a boatload of special features that would be of interest to any fan of film or student of story or animation.

You can (and should) pick up the Blu-ray in a 5-disc set for less than $25 on Amazon.

Here’s a peek at some of those great special features they featured on the Blu-ray, like this piece about original opening of the film:

And here’s a piece about flashbacks:

And here’s another one about Albert Brooks and never saying lines the same way twice: