I know, I know. “Pixelbot, I HATE anime! It all sucks!” I’ve heard this, and similar lines throughout my existence. Here’s the real issue: You haven’t watched the right stuff. “Dragonball” does not count, nor does “Pokemon”. So, without any further delays, I’ll teach you the simple steps to enjoy at least some anime.

First off, baby steps. Series are never a good starting point for the uninitiated. I recommend Hayao Miyazaki’s works first. Beautiful artwork, and stories good enough to make you forget you’re watching something Japanese. “Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind” or “Spirited Away” are prime examples of some of his work. While family films, they boast mature themes without reaching the gross-out factor of films like “Akira”. I can almost guarantee you will like at least one of his films.

So, You really liked them? The next steps are some no-miss series to look into, and there’s really something for everyone. Do you like psychological thrillers? Try Deathnote. It’s about a high school genius who stumbles on a notebook one day. Printed on the inside are instructions stating that anyone’s name written in the notebook will die, with other factors also available. On testing, Light finds the notebook to do just as it says, and assumes a new identity known as “Kira”, taking it upon himself to “clean” the world and start a new one filled with just people with him as their god.

Sounds far out, but the series’s real draw comes from clash of the opposing sides. The Police have a genius of their own, and he tries to expose the real identity of Kira to bring him to justice. The creators have crafted believable circumstances, and steps both sides would take to discover and avoid detection, respectively.

Maybe Sci-fi’s your thing? Then check out “Cowboy Bebop”. Arguably the best anime out there, I would even consider it one of the best televised shows, myself. It’s several years in the future, and Earth is in a bad way. A disaster involving Gate technology (the series’s version of hyperspace; more specifically, the gate to access said time/space warp) has literally destroyed the moon, filling the atmosphere with debris that regularly rain down on the surface, so common they’re reported much like rain showers. Those who could afford it went to Mars, and terraformed domes, living life much like usual. Because of this sudden spread of humanity, Bounty Hunters for criminals have become a necessity. Spike Spegiel and Jet Black are such individuals, and the story progresses fluidly through the episodes. The best thing to consider is that there’s not a lot of “No way could that happen in real life” moments. The characters are human; no jumping fifty feet in the air, they can get hurt, and even die. Also, you won’t find irritating J-pop here. All the music is done in a Blues/Jazz style, and you can pick up the complete box set for a paltry $39.99.

Anime is capable of telling great stories without characters monologue-ing for 5 minutes on how they’re gonna destroy you, you just have to look deeper. So, give it a try. You may be surprised with what you find.