THURSDAY THROWBACK TOY REVIEW: McFarlane’s Monsters Series: Twisted Fairy Tales – “Gretel”

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McFarlane’s Monsters 2005 Series 4
Twisted Fairy Tales
Scale: 6inches
“Gretel”
www.spawn.com

McFarlane’s Monsters are some of the coolest/family friendly figures to collect. If you’re a sweet little Irish-catholic woman and you buy this for little Jimmy to play with… you’ll surely win a “Mother-of-the-Year” award. I guarantee it. Twisted Fairy Tales is a line of toys based off nursery rhyme characters and, you’ve guessed it, fairy tales. “Adult themed and horribly grotesque” best describes the six characters to choose from: Humpty Dumpty, Red Riding Hood, Miss Muffet, Peter Pumpkin Eater, Hansel, and finally, Gretel. In this review, I’ll be focusing on Gretel.

Gretel, as you can see, is very attractive in the, I-just-killed-my-mother sort of way. Her body is detailed very well. Her fish-nets bend to the contour of her posed leg. Going down, her pumps are covered in blood that she’s mopping up. I really enjoyed the henna tattoos all over her body. I find comfort in a candy-cane tribal tat on any female leg, don’t you?

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The accessories are pretty straight forward. An old bucket with great colors and fades and a bloody mop. Both are colored extremely well for such a cheap figure. If you take a good look at the blood-pool you’ll notice a finger – or maybe it’s a penis – floating merrily in the blood.

Whether you’re a fan of minute details like blood stained knees, elbows, etc. or you just want to spice up your collectibles with blood and gore, have a bloody good time with Gretel and her ghastly gang. Collect all six! If you act now, I’ll even throw-in a dick joke… stayin’ classy as always bitches!!!

You can pick up Gretel and all the other fucked up Twisted Fairy Tale figures over at Amazon.com