If you haven’t noticed lately, many of the Secret Origins columns lately have dealt with characters that have ties to this year’s summer blockbusters. This week follows that trend, but with a bit of a twist. There are so many Green Lanterns that if I decided to profile each one, it’d take this weekly column nearly 138 years to do it. Luckily for me, most Lantern origins are somewhat the same, They follow the lines of “Pre-existing GL dies and leaves the ring to someone else”. There are exceptions, most of the earth-based Lanterns are unique in some fashion, but none like today’s entry. You see, he’s a member of the Green Lantern Corps, but he’s not a Green Lantern. Intrigued? Let’s get down to it then, with the one and only member of the F-Sharp Bell Corps, Rot Lop Fan!
Rot’s story actually begins with Katma Tui, who has an interesting origin herself… a story for another time, perhaps. Anyway, Katma is being debriefed by everyone’s favorite hydrocephalic space Nazis, the Guardians of the Universe. It seems Katma was on assignment to bestow the powers of a Green Lantern to someone in a region called the Obsidian Depths, which is known for not having any light or stars to call its own. As the blue beach ball heads continue, they need Katma to explain herself, because she says while her mission was successful, there is still no Green Lantern patrolling the depths.
"And besides, Big Head Bowling is appearing on the viso-screen in 5 Earth minutes!"
Being the dutiful lapdog Lantern that she is, Katma starts to relate her fate. You see, the thing about space is, it’s black, and the thing about the Obsidian Depths is that they’re really black, so Katma is having a bit of a tough time even finding the right planet, let alone the one sentient in the area who is worthy enough to wield the ring. She does eventually find the right place, thanks to her ring to homing in on the correct gravitational field. Even so, there is still no light but that of her own Lantern’s light. She attacks the darkness with her light, and eventually finds her chosen one. He doesn’t seem fazed at all by the light. Katma, assuming that things are great, approaches the chosen ring-bearer, and discovers something she hadn’t expected…
It took millennia for his race to develop Rebecca Black's "Friday" as a defense mechanism, but the time was well spent.
After the initial shock, Katma uses her ring to translate, and she finds the alien is our titular Rot Lop Fan. Rot cannot see, which makes sense, since there is no light on his world. By touch, he tells Katma that it’s too bad she’s deformed (by his standards), as she has a beautiful voice. After that rather strange flirtation, Katma changes the subject by explaining many new concepts to Rot, such as the existence of other planets, and the need to protect them. When she gets down to the nitty-gritty of explaining how the GLs protect space, she runs into a bit of a problem…
After all the Lanterns have done over the years, I have a few untranslatable words to describe them, too.
Unfortunately, when you are trying to talk to a species that has no concept of light, color, or objects that radiate those things, it’s kind of difficult to get your point across. To Katma’s credit, she continues to try, but it just gets worse. When she tries to teach the Green Lantern Oath to Rot Lop Fan, fully one-third of it is untranslatable, as it pertains to day, night, sight and light. Katma, is diligent, but eventually, she realizes the road to madness lies with trying the same thing 1,000 times and expecting different results, so she resigns herself to failure…
"You're an alien? Oh forget this, then!"
It’s a good thing that Katma is as smart as she is “deformed”. If I were playing Green Lantern word association, if someone said “ring” I’d look at my hand. Not Katma, though, she’s thinking musically! She has Rot Lop Fan put the ring on his appendage, and asks him if he’s familiar with what a bell is. The ring has no problem translating this, so it’s obvious that he does, but he assures Katma nonetheless. She asks him to think and concentrate on holding a bell in his hand, and amazingly, the ring changes its shape to that of a bell! Katma, being extremely pleased with herself, knows that proper nomenclature is important, so she asks Rot Lop Fan what his favorite note/pitch is. Rot says that F-Sharp has a nice ring to it. Katma christens Rot as the F-Sharp Bell of his sector, and explains with his bell, he cause make sound waves that can form solid objects. She has him give it a shot, and the effect is actually pretty spectacular.
Sadly, Rot Lop Fan's first construct summoned the dreaded "Death Flower Butterfly". They were never heard from again.
After some further training, such as using the power battery like a tuning fork, Katma decides it is time to try the GL Oath again, because well, you simply must have a battle cry. In all seriousness, the F-Sharp Bell Oath is pretty great. Here it is in its entirety.
In Loudest Din, Or Hush Profound
My Ears Catch Evil’s Slightest Sound
Let Those Who Toll Out Evil’s Knell
Beware My Power: The F-Sharp Bell!
Brings a tear to your eye, doesn’t it? Anyway, sensing her work is done, Katma leaves her charge, leaving out a teeny, tiny detail…
A bit short-sigthed, don't you think? What if Rot Lop has to assist a fellow Lantern in the Yellow Galaxy of Ponn?
With that, Katma wraps up her story to the Guardians. Explaining that Rot Lop Fan may not even qualify for the Green Lantern Corps. All I have to say about that is then why the heck did you (A) give him a ring in the first place, and (B) adapt it to his use? With judgement calls like that, it’s no wonder the Guardians try to keep the Lanterns on such short leashes! WIth Rot Lop Fan’s status in the air, Katma asks the Guardians to sort it all out. For once, those crazy red-dressed short stacks have a witty retort…
Did that Cerulean Caesar just make a funny? Now I've seen everything!
The story ends there, but thankfully, the career of the F-Sharp Bell does not! Rot Lop Fan is seen over the years a handful of times, and is so fondly remembered that he’s getting a bit of screen time in the upcoming Green Lantern movie! Well, he has an action figure in the movie line, at least…
I don't see why they'd alter the design so much if he wasn't gonna be in the movie.
This story originally appeared in Tales of the Green Lantern Corps Annual #3, 1987. It was reprinted in the DC Universe: The Stories of Alan Moore trade paperback. Oh yeah, did I forget to mention ‘ol Rot Lop Fan was created by everyone’s favorite be-beared recluse? Well, he was, and both character and creation are awesome.
