A WALK IN THE WOODS (6 out of 10) Directed by Ken Kwapis; Written by Rick Kerb, Bill Holderman, (Michael Arndt), based on the book by Bill Bryson; Starring Robert Redford, Nick Nolte, Emma Thompson, Mary Steenburgen, Nick Offerman, Kristen Schaal; Rated R for “language and some sexual references;” 104 minutes; In semi-wide release September 2, 2015.
The naturalist John Muir once stated (and misquoted in this film and its trailer) “I never took much time to prepare for a trip—just long enough to throw bread and tea in an old sack and jump over the back fence.”
Unfortunately, that sort of approach works well for hiking, but not so much for filmmaking. Despite being in development for almost 10 years, and an original script by Oscar winner Michael Arndt (later rewritten), the final version of this film feels thin and unsure of what it is trying to say or do.
The film is based on Bill Bryson’s (played here by a charismatic-as-ever Robert Redford) bestselling memoir about his attempt to hike the Appalachian Trail with his frenemy “Katz” (a curmudeonly Nick Nolte). Their misadventures play out as part nature porn as they hike through state and national parks and some of the most beautiful scenery in America, and part formulaic bad road-trip odd couple movie.
When the film works best is when it’s hiking through these amazing vistas that Bryson set out to explore in the first place. They’re a part of a shared national history that defines us and unites us across over 2,200 miles, 14 states, and over 200 years. In them, Bryson finds the connection he’s looking for and works out the midlife crisis that precipitates this ill advised hike by two people who really have no business attempting it.
The film is a lot less good when they stray into the towns that surround the trail to resupply. Besides the distaste of watching Nick Nolte hit on anything that moves and talk like the most mysoginistic frat boy dude bro (where most of the film’s R rating comes from), it’s just boring. And unbelievable. And dumb.
We’re supposed to believe Robert Redford is considering cheating on his wife, played by Emma Thompson, with the proprietor of a motel/restaurant where they stay, played by Mary Steenburgen. Yeah, no. And this is only prevented because Nick Nolte hooked up with someone at the laundromat, only to be chased literally out of town by her husband. Yeah, no.
This not only provides a serious tonal shift in the movie, but a needless one. And when they get back to the woods and the trail, the movie gets good again.
There’s another issue of believability here. Quick fact-check: Robert Redford is 79. (WOW! Really? He looks amazing for being 79!) Nick Nolte is 74.
The real Bill Bryson? He’s only 63. And when he published A Walk in the Woods he was 47. Two people hiking the Appalachian Trail in their 40’s is a completely different affair than hiking it in your 60’s or 70’s. Some of the more frank sexual dialogue might have been more palatable, and midlife crisis more relatable, if it had been between, say, Ben Affleck and Matt Damon, who are actually age appropriate for this film.
Also age appropriate for this role? Nick Offerman, who is criminally underutilized here. I’d have much preferred a movie about Nick Offerman camping in the woods than what we got here. Also underutilized were Kristen Schaal and Emma Thompson. Schaal shows up just long enough to insult our main characters, annoy them, sing Daft Punk’s “Get Lucky”, and allow them to basically have a “kids these days and their hiking and rock and roll music and . . . ” moment. But every moment Thompson was on screen was a delight, and there were far too few of them. I’d have preferred a movie about her camping in the woods as well.
There’s a version of this film that would work incredibly well. And it’s modeled more on the success of The Trip and its sequel The Trip to Italy. Those films took similar character types and a similar premise and, for lack of a better term, knew where they were going. There was a strong sense of purpose and relatable character arcs. A Walk in the Woods fails to connect on these levels. Perhaps it will do better with audiences of a certain age, but it seems silly to sacrifice relatability for the comedy of old guys who have no business camping.
But for being based on such a well-written and enjoyable memoir, this film doesn’t capture that magic other than showing off the amazing scenery of some of our best national and state parks and forests and wilderness areas. Enjoy it for the nature porn and Redford’s still-amazing charisma, but not much else.
(6 out of 10)
Note: Citizen-Bot is an employee of the conservation club founded by John Muir in 1892. Not sure if that constitutes some sort of conflict of interest here, but in the era of GamerGate, we wouldn’t want anyone claiming I’m an Environmental Justice Warrior and that somehow colored my review, would we?. No, wait. I’d totes love that.
SJW/EJW for life. I’m “in the tank” for the environment.