It’s time for a random episode! #AreWeRecordingYet? Jon gets really defensive about amature porn. Porn was great for a while, but it became unrealistic so Jon wants to get back to basics of weird scars and birthmarks. Do you know how much masturbation Jon has done? An insane amount. Just a lot of dope and jacking.
On the subject of sex, intimacy, and love: Lucas and Jon come up with Harry Potter euphemisms but only one of them gets laid because of it. Try to guess who it is (hint: Jon can’t stop laughing to himself while delivering one liners). Tom is good with the ladies, so he is no stranger to Harry Potter pick up lines. Tyson tries and fails. The books should really be called Tom Riddle and the Little Bastard.
Tom’s work has a Tesla they use just for picking up hookers. He also just works on video games. He’s living the dream. But the new guy wrecked the car. Avid supporter Bentley works with Tom, may be in amature porn under Bentley Harddick. Tom brings everything to a grinding halt with a “Death Eaters” joke.
Via Oujia board, Rebecca submitted a “would you rather?” question. Tyson calls The Beyond to get some answers from a ghost. New Doritos flavor: Cool American. Nick should be glad he skipped this episode.
In other news, Tyson’s still working on his basement. Everyone is excited for Logan. Jon wants to third-wheel Lucas’s anniversary date. Movie theaters with other people suck, Lucas will never go on the weekends again. Tyson hates that people eat during movies and doesn’t want to gamble on using up energy to take his kid. Jon thought he was going to have a good time at the new Underworld movie, but then people kept showing up. Whatever happened to the experience?!
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